I See You
by Steve Zissou
Summary: Her name is Darcy and sometimes she can see him. Sometimes she can't. Sometimes she whips around when he stands behind her and ghosts his fingertips over her shoulder blades and she says, "I know you're there."


I am not thrilled with the result but in response to a prompt from skadi about Loki's punishment being that he is ghost like and unseen by nearly everyone except maybe one person… here you go.

He spends the first night watching the skies. They are riddled with signs of unrest. It rains for seven days when he is cast onto Midgard and the storm is Thor mourning, he thinks. It gives him hope but he does not show this.  
It doesn't matter if he did or not though, because no one will see the slightly painful smile that flickers across his mouth.

He spends the first night roaming the earth's most sacred places. He doesn't know where ghosts go when they aren't allowed to rest in the halls of the dead but are shut out instead. Loki isn't even dead.

But for what feels like an age he wishes he was.

* * *

He haunts her accidentally, at first. It's a habit of his to linger near Thor these days. He tried to avoid it at first, tried to stay away, but every storm and roll of thunder her ever heard reminded him of Thor's anguish when the banishment was spoken. He has to see him again, just has to.

He finds Thor holding the mortal, finds them tangled together under bedsheets and listening to rain falling softly against the window of the bedroom they are in. Loki is there for five whole minutes and in those few minutes he hears Thor whisper how much Loki is missed.

Is loved.

Is longed for.

"I wish he would find his way home."

Loki wants to scream. He flees the room and he does scream until he his hoarse, until his lungs feel like they might burst, until he is dizzy and until his head pounds, until she says, "uh, do you mind?"

He haunts her accidentally, at first, and truly flees seconds after discovering the girl standing in the living room where he is screaming.

He comes back two days later.

This becomes a habit more than his habit to linger near Thor.

* * *

Her name is Darcy and sometimes she can see him. Sometimes she can't. Sometimes she whips around when he stands behind her and ghosts his fingertips over her shoulder blades and she says, "I know you're there."

Jane thinks she is crazy. Thor says nothing but looks… thoughtful.

* * *

One night he reveals himself. He doesn't mean to but she is crying and sobbing and having a fit and he is angry in a way that feels unnatural. He shouldn't care if she were to fall off a cliff and die, let alone sob over some mortal boy. But here he is, sitting on the edge of her bed as she hugs a pillow to muffle her sobs and he half expects her to try and swat him with it, like a bug.

Or maybe she'll screech, or say, ha! I see you again! I know you're there!  
Instead she reaches for him and her hand passes through his chest. If she looked sad before now she looks like a kicked puppy. He doesn't move as she tries again. Eventually she gives up but at least she isn't crying anymore.

"I don't get it," she says.

"Me either," he replies.

She smiles. It's very small. It's very pretty. He wants to break that boy's teeth but she is smiling so he thinks maybe he won't. (As if he could.)

* * *

He shows up more frequently. She stops going out with boys that make him want to break their teeth. She asks if she can tell Thor (he says no) and if he is there for Thor (he doesn't answer) and how long does he have to be there (he says forever or until he is welcome again.) She asks him about how he learned magic and does he miss it and what will be the first spell he does when he gets it back (never if, with her, always when.)

Sometimes she tries to show him things he doesn't understand fully. What is an ipod and what is this Harry Potter book and why does she study political science when Jane works in a different field, isn't it useless? She gets indignant when he calls her useless.

She says he is useless because what good is he just ghosting up the damn place.

They fight a lot.

Jane thinks she is really crazy, Thor still remains fairly thoughtful.

* * *

One day she nearly dies. He saves her life. It's called possession when he finds out he can merge himself with her, that he can control her body. He uses her fists to knock a boy out that tried to get her to do something she didn't want to do, when the boy threatens her life if she doesn't comply. She's livid after that he would control her like that.

Later she is laying on her bed and listening to music softly. He lays beside her, facing her. He can't hold her, she can't press herself to him. Instead he lifts a hand, palm facing her, and she lifts hers, palm facing him, and they move them together so close that she swears she can practically feel him there, really feel him.

He doesn't know what to do when she tells him she is sorry that he ever went unseen. He thinks he should be angry and unwelcoming of her sorrow but insted he feels speechless.

Then he says he is sorry she goes unseen sometimes too.

But he sees her.

And she says, "I see you too."

* * *

One day he tries to come to her, as it only takes one single thought for him to be anywhere in this form, but when he closes his eyes and focuses on drawing himself to her he finds himself instead standing before Odin.

Nothing is said at first but the two stare and stare and stare until finally Odin moves forward and touches his youngest on the shoulder.

"I have always seen you. Even now, this whole time, all these years, I have watched."

Loki wants to be angry but he doesn't know how or why. He can justify his anger like has in the past but before he can even try he thinks of her. He thinks of how she would say when, when, when. Never if. He's always been questioning when.

When would it be his turn?

His time?

His?

When?

Odin seems to know this question is on his heart and he nods slowly.

"Now is better than never."

Loki touches his father's hand. His heart feels light.

* * *

Darcy wakes up and finds him laying beside her again. This is not new. She blinks sleepily at him and buries her face into her pillow to hide it from the morning light. She grows still when she feels his hand in her hair.

She grows still but her heart races and her nerves sing and then she hears it, his voice smooth and soft in her ear.

"I see you, Darcy Lewis. And I feel you, too."

They kiss in the morning light.

Jane is glad Darcy hasn't gone crazy (even if she doesn't look thrilled to see him) and Thor looks knowing and thoughtful when he embraces Loki.

Says, "you found your way home."

Says, "I knew you would."

Says, "welcome back, brother."


End file.
